This morning I sat.
A couple mornings ago, I walked into my living room and realized I’d been very remiss. My Mac book sat primly on my meditation cushion. In fact, the Mac had been mediating off and on for the last few weeks and I most definitely had not. The little white box now sat clearly finely balanced and moving along just fine.
My butt needed to be on the cushion. I am the one in need of a tune. Of a balancing.
In all my years, I don’t think I’ve ever been under pressure like I am now and I am not sitting. Tricycle is finishing up their “Big Sit”. There is a drop-in meditation group that I used to regularly sit with, but it’s at the wrong time. By 8:30 in the morning I am rolling along full bore and am not willing (or mentally able) to stop it all and sit for a half hour.
My habits are not hard and fast. I amble through the early morning. Usually, I start coffee and drag my laptop into bed or sit in the chair in the living room (next to the mediation cushion) catch up on emails and news first thing. Then I make up a rough list on a note pad of pressing projects. Often on the same note pad as the day, before so I slide yesterday’s left-overs onto the new list. Socks jumps up and curls next to my hip, purring I reach down and scratch behind her ears for a moment and she’s happy for the duration.
The coffee burbles through and I wait, finishing up the immediate tasks before getting a first cup.
This morning, I put on a teapot and then start the coffee. By the time I’d finished grinding the beans, taking out the old grinds, rinsing the coffee cone, replacing the filter and pouring the water into the Braun, the tea water boiled.
I made a cup.
Then moved into the living room, I moved a chair so I would face a blank wall for focus. I moved my Mac off the cushion to my desk and threw the new Kootenay Mountain Culture magazine on the appropriate stack of magazines. After taking two sips of the hot tea, relishing the bitter turning sweet, I sat.
Some things are really like riding a bike. I calmed. I started breathing slower, deeper. I folded my hands in my lap and moved on.
I don’t know how long I mediated. Five, ten minutes. Not much more. My tea was cooled, but still a little warm when I stopped. It was good. My butt needed the cushion far more than the Mac.
Now that I’ve broken back into the way, it will be interesting to see if the little sit expandes into a bigger and regular sit.
And for the record, after I sat, I turned on the coffee and washed the dishes. Thanks Jack, but I did laundry a couple days ago.